Hi, I’m Nick.

Nick-North-Transman.jpg
 
NN-triangle-group.png
 

 HI, I’M NICK.  

I USED TO LIVE AS A WOMAN.

Let me clarify.  I was assigned female at birth and spent the first 30 years of my life living as a woman.

LET’S HIT THE HIGH POINTS THOUGH SHALL WE?

 
IMG_2283.jpg

AGE 6

I SAT ON THE STAIRS OF MY HOUSE, HOT TEARS ON MY FACE, BURNING IN MY CHEST, “WHY CAN’T I JUST BE A BOY LIKE ALL THE OTHER BOYS?”

 
 

AGE 8

Kicking and screaming and yelling

“FINE! I’M NOT GOING TO YOUR WEDDING IF I HAVE TO WEAR A DRESS”.

I wore the dress. It wasn’t my choice.

 

AGE 12

THERE’S A NEW GIRL IN CLASS.

Her eyes are so blue.  Her smile is so big.  Her desk is beside mine.  I am smitten.  She becomes my best friend.

She gets a boyfriend who is not me.  I die a thousand deaths, get a new best friend and fall in line by getting a boyfriend of my own.

 

age 13

I FIND JESUS.

There is something so very wrong with me.

Maybe I can pray it away. Maybe I can change if I just try hard enough.

227057_5031330644_5944_n.jpg

Age 16

CUT MY HAIR SHORT. PLAYED THE BASS FOR THE CHURCH YOUTH GROUP. WAS CALLED A “BOY WITH SPUNK” IN FRONT OF THE CHURCH BY THE FANCY VISITING MISSIONARY FROM THE PULPIT. HAD TO EMBARRASSINGLY CORRECT HIM WITH THE HOT SHAMEFUL WORDS “I’M A GIRL” AND WONDER IF EVERYONE KNEW MY EMBARRASSING SECRET THAT I WASN’T REALLY A GIRL?

I was determined to GIRL even harder.

 
IMG_2282.jpg

Age 19

GOT MARRIED TO MY BEST FRIEND AND MESSILY (AS IS SEEMINGLY THE ONLY WAY) LEFT THE CHURCH TOGETHER.

Ages 20-29

GREW LONG HAIR, TRIED TO LOVE NAIL POLISH, READ ALL THE MOM BOOKS, AND BIRTHED 4 CHILDREN,
ACQUIRED THINGS AND JOBS AND A DEEP PIT OF DESPAIR IN THE DEPTHS OF MY SOUL.

NickAnnaWedding_050.jpg

Age 30

ALL MY KIDS ARE BIRTHED. I’VE SECRETLY (EVEN UNKNOWN TO ME) FALLEN IN LOVE WITH MY BEST FRIEND AGAIN.

This time I have to tell the truth, turns out I’m gay. Get divorced. Marry best friend and acquire 5th child (she’s a real keeper).

Did I mention ALL THE THERAPY!

AGE 31

ACTUALLY, I’M A MAN.

Acknowledging that truth feels like pure oxygen to my starved lungs.  SO MUCH THERAPY. Transition begins.

Physical Transition = amazing.

Social Transition = challenging.

Example A – That Time I Mansplained Childbirth.

REALLIFE-conference.jpg

age 32

STARTED DELIVERING KEYNOTES AT COOL CONFERENCES SUCH AS “BRAVE”, AND “THE REAL LIFE CONFERENCE”. CO-CREATED AND FACILITATED BALLSY, WITH KRISTEN KALP

 

Age 33

MAKING A STORYHIVE DOCUMENTARY, SPEAKING GIGS, HAVING TOP SURGERY, AND FIGHTING THE TRUMP ADMINISTRATION.

 
 
NN-triangle-group.png
 

Now

Kicking ass and taking names